"silly me, look what i did again. i found what i want is what i cannot have.... i didn't mean to be so predictable, but i blame all on who made you irresistable"
so love triangles dont only happen in the movies. you dont really realize you are at the point of one until you sit back and look at the situation. and i am absolutely in that triangle. whoops. and people say i should be happy to feel loved. i do, and i understand that. but what happens when you love the wrong person. is there a wrong person? or do we just make assumptions. i mean you never know till you try, right? but what makes you want to try it with someone over another person, even when someone wants to try it with you, and you want to try it with someone else, and they have no idea any of these feelings are happening. and what happens when you cant tell them?
i dont like getting myself in binds like this. who does? but i also hate not being able to express anything. i have my own ideas on what could be, or how things should be, but am i denying reality? is reality what you make it, or is it a preconcieved thing that you will never be able to change? or is it always evolving as we evolve....
so i am trying to just go with it, but so many factors make it so hard. i want to love again. i think i am capable of it, but my luck hasn't been on my side yet. i am still waiting for it to come round soon. maybe i am just denying i am scared. how do you overcome fear? "two dragons guard fear's mansion. one is ceramic and chinese. the other is real. if you make it past the dragons and speak to him up close, it is amazing to see how fragile he is." how do you break past the dragons? anyone?
"you should of warned me about the undertow....."
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